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Every year around this time people all over the world are shirking their resolutions they made only a week ago! Shocking…  I know.  Statistics say, only 3% of the people who make “New Year’s Resolutions” actually follow through with them all year long.  Those are incredibly high odds stacked against anyone who dares to resolve to be better this year than the last.  But these are the kind of odds we Leaders yearn for…  To test our strength and, most importantly, our resolve!

You know, that’s a funny word, resolve.  It’s a word that implies power, force, tenacity, free will, and more importantly…  Determination.  Yet we take it for granted and pin it up every year with delusions of grandeur that we never actually intend to keep.  I think it’s just something most people do as a ritual of “Ringing in the New Year” than they do for the betterment of themselves.

So, why all this doom and gloom?  Because it’s important to understand perceptions others have and ones we may have before we can ever hope to do anything about them.  Stephen Covey writes about our personal perception in his book, “7 Habits of Highly Effective People.” Only he calls it “Your Paradigm,” which I like, by the way.  I like it because it’s another one of those words with implied power and mystery.

In “7 Habits” Mr. Covey talks about how someone’s paradigms have lasting effects in how we play out our roles in life.

…whether they shift us in positive or negative directions, whether they are instantaneous or developmental, paradigm shifts move us from one way of seeing the world to another.  And those shifts create powerful change.  Our paradigms, correct or incorrect, are the sources of our attitudes and behaviors, and ultimately our relationships with others.

That was the most important paragraph I’ve read so far this year.  Our paradigm, how we view our world around us… or our perception of our world, is the basis of how we react to circumstances in our world.

Such as the person who views themselves as the victim.  Every confrontation they encounter only hardens their perception, or paradigm that they are truly a victim of circumstance.  They are more anxious and take things personally when they aren’t meant to be personal.  They live in a world where they actually believe to some degree or another that people are just out to get them, to watch them fail… miserably!

Or how about the person that believes there is only good in the world and no harm will come to them if they stick to their beliefs.  They are positive and trusting, trying to help everyone who comes their way.  They live in a world where there are no muggers, rapist, or criminals, just misunderstood people trying to express themselves.

Now these are both extreme paradigms to live in but none the less, everyone has met someone at one time or another that would fit into one of these categories or another.  Most would agree that neither perception of the world is correct or healthy, one might get you killed and the other might wind you up all alone in an empty house.

But you may be surprised to find out that once in awhile each and every one of us puts on the “Victim Cap” or the “Cap of Innocence.”  And it never works out the way we want it to, either.  But if we are open to ourselves and to others around us we can shift our paradigm to a more realistic and useful perception.

WARNING: If you find yourself in the corner grocery store angry about buying a loaf of bread for $5 and thinking about all the ways those Mean Corporate Executives are spending the thousands or millions of people’s $5 bills.  Stop yourself and ask, “Is this a realistic paradigm I’m living?”

My phrase for 2010 is “Convictions in Action” because it signifies the one area I need to work on in my life more than anything…  Procrastination!  Yeah, that’s my warm cuddly enemy that zaps all kinds of success from my life.  So this Year my Resolution is to BE PROACTIVE.  I use both phrases throughout the day.

Like when my wife asked me to make the bed this morning.  I thought, okay no big deal.  Then, after 2 movies I came upstairs to change clothes and the bed still wasn’t made.  As I started to grab my clothes and take a shower I stopped, sighed and thought, “Be Proactive.  These are your Convictions in Action.”  Then turned.  Made the bed.  And went on about my business.  It only took me about 2 minutes but, it was the act of simply delaying that was about to kill my resolution before it even started.  Besides I knew my wife wasn’t going to be annoyed with me when she got home since I had done what she asked.

It’s time we all started to be more Proactive in our own lives.  With our spouses, children, friends, and neighbors.  Broaden your resolve and follow through with a resolution that liberates your independence so, others that need to can depend on you for support.

Find out more about being proactive with Steven R. Covey’s “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”

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